You know those TV commercials where someone gets a new car for Christmas with a ludicrously oversized bow on it?
Apparently, some people receive even more extravagant gifts than that — that is, if you believe some of the luxury gift guides floating around this holiday season. These aren’t gift “guides” for pedestrian gawkers like us.
Following are some of the most fascinating, weird or possibly annoying gift ideas suggested to folks for whom money is no object.
1. Motorized surfboard
Estimated cost for this gift: $13,195
Wired’s luxury gift guide would like to draw your attention to what appears to be a very expensive ironing board. In fact, though, it’s a hydrofoil surfboard that supports up to 220 pounds. For up to nearly an hour on a single charge, you can surf a foot above the waves at speeds reaching 30 miles per hour.
Better be sure about this one: “Your purchase is final once we have received payment in full for your product and shipped it to you. We do not accept the return of any product unless faulty,” boardmaker Fliteboard says.
2. ‘Selfwinding chronograph’
Estimated cost for this gift: $57,900 (which is only 67 cents per second of the day, if you really think about it)
Live in the lap of ultra-luxury with one of a dozen watch recommendations (there are also options in four and six figures, if you prefer) in Haute Living’s gift guide. This is the ultimate gift for someone who has rejected the supremacy of 12-hour-based timekeeping and who also wants to be reminded of waffles every time they glance toward their wrist.
3. Private jet tour of Latin American restaurants
Estimated cost for this gift: $172,500 per person (based on four people)
For the biggest foodies in your life, the Robb Report’s Ultimate Gift Guide recommends this 10-night “gastronomical odyssey.” You’ll fly from Mexico to Argentina, with stops in Peru and Chile in between, to dine with the head chefs of the finest taco bars in the world.
It’s not all tacos, of course. There are many restaurants that defy categorization, serving dishes such as “pink-tomato mariscal on a pumpkin.” Accommodations are included.
4. Horseback ride through the desert
Estimated cost for this gift: A mere $18,750 per person
How would you like eight Arabian nights exploring ancient Egyptian history close up? It could happen if your rich uncle gifts you this horseback adventure suggested by the Robb Report. You’ll see Cairo and the Great Pyramid of Giza, stay in a desert oasis inn, then explore a necropolis, temples and the Valley of the Kings.
Your ride for much of the trip won’t have AC and may not be as smooth as you’re used to, but don’t look a gift horse in the mouth. Besides, it’s not all on horseback: You also get to ride in a hot-air balloon and a plane (in business class).
5. Kid-size electric Ferrari
Estimated cost for this gift: $130,500
Did you know they make little Ferraris? Not a lot of them; fewer than 300. But one of these “fully electric 75 percent scale reproduction[s] of the 250 Testa Rossa” could belong to you or someone you love, for just a little bit more than some four-year college degrees.
Despite the size, these can go up to 50 miles per hour — in Europe. “The Top Speed of the Ferrari Testa Rossa J in the US & Canada will be 19mph,” The Little Car Company says. It also has four modes to safely accommodate drivers of all ages: Novice, Comfort, Sport and Race.
6. Chanel roller skates
Estimated cost for this gift: $5,125
Why settle for Chanel No. 5 when you can wear a pair of Chanel 5k skates?
What makes them so special? Couldn’t tell you. The official listing just says they come in black or white, are made partially of calfskin, and have 0.4 inch of heel height. The webpage isn’t even blemished by something as trivial as a dollar sign; you have to “contact an advisor” to discover the price.
Fortunately, we have Goop’s “Ridiculous but Awesome” gift guide to save us the trouble.
7. Sci-fi superpowers
Estimated cost for this gift: $935,000
Light up the night like only a cybernetic wizard — or someone very wealthy — could by wearing what the Robb Report describes as “bleeding-edge biotech [that] requires a specially designed suit — imagine something between motorcycle leathers and a streamlined NASA space suit — rigged with haptic sensors to track your gestures and measure your heart rate, breathing, and pulse.”
As you swing your arms in some approximation of conducting an orchestra or casting some fantastic spell, your (temporary) army of drones will array themselves in dazzling patterns of color and movement. The magic only gets more dramatic as your heart rate and excitement pick up over the 45-minute battery duration.