Five Really Stupid Gift Ideas

In case you needed another look at this season’s round-up of stupid gift ideas, here they are again:

1. Afterlife Telegrams: http://www.afterlifetelegrams.com/
2. The Something Store: http://www.somethingstore.com/
3. You’ve Been Left Behind: http://www.youvebeenleftbehind.com/
4. Prairie Tumbleweed Farm: http://prairietumbleweedfarm.com/
5. Lucky Break Wishbone Company: http://www.luckybreakwishbone.com/ourproducts_carded.php

Of course, these aren’t the only places you’ll find stupid gifts: I’m sure you can come up with plenty on your own. And if you can’t, not to worry: the web is full of places that can help. For example, check out (what else?) stupid.com. Here you can go to the stupid holiday gift inventory and browse a vertitable cornucopia of corny, from “Pooping Reindeer Candy” ($4.99) to the “Jesus Saves Bank” ($15.99) to “Holiday Smencils” (pencils that smell like Christmas: $8.99)

Even some gifts that are ostensibly serious leave me scratching my head when I see them advertised during the holidays. For example, a cell phone. Why on earth would you give someone a gift that’s going to cost them money every month for the rest of their life? Or what about electric razors: have you ever met anyone of either sex who thinks an electric shaves as close as a blade? Despite costing three times what they used to, they still end up under the sink for a good reason: they suck.

What about gift cards? While these can theoretically make a handy gift for teens or others who want to pick their own stuff, when carried to extremes these can make the stupidest of all possible gifts. And I can use my own family as an unfortunate example. Over the years our Christmas gathering has gradually devolved into nothing more than exchanging gift cards from places like Target or Home Depot. Which means we’re essentially getting together to hand each other $100: a straight revenue swap. How memorable!

I guess as long as there are people desperate for a unique ideas there will be a market for stupid gifts. But I think the holidays would be a lot better if people tried using a little more imagination and a little less money. For example, I’d rather have a hand-made towel rack, a poem or a framed picture of my family than a gift card. Would it still end up in the closet or a drawer? Probably. But at least I’d know the giver thought of me for longer than the time it took to whip out a credit card to buy a Home Depot gift card.

What’s the stupidest gift you ever got?