Money Talks’ Stacy Johnson Selected to Head Government Investigation of Suze Orman

Photo (cc) by merfam

Suze Orman, known widely through books, numerous appearances on Oprah, and a television show on CNBC, is the target of a recent probe by the newly formed Consumer Financial Protection Bureau. Named as lead investigator is Money Talks News President Stacy Johnson.

“Orman only gives two kinds of advice – the same stuff you’ve already gotten from your mom; and wrong,” said acting chief of the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau Elizabeth Warren, adding, “It’s high time Orman and others like her answered for their pandering drivel. On her show, Orman has a segment called ‘Can I Afford It?’ Well, the American people can no longer afford to watch this silly crap.”

Named as head of the investigating committee was Stacy Johnson, CPA, longtime consumer advocate and publisher of Money Talks News. During yesterday’s press conference, held in Washington, Johnson said, “There’s something wrong with a system where Oprah Winfrey decides who’s an expert and who’s not. Rather than an appearance on Oprah being the sole determining factor of who becomes a financial ‘guru,’ maybe we should try something new – like putting people on TV who actually know what they’re talking about. You know – people who actually went to college and studied this stuff.”

Orman is expected to testify before the newly formed committee sometime in early May. Other potential targets are rumored to include Rich Dad Poor Dad’s Robert Kiyosaki, Automatic Millionaire author David Bach, and Kevin Trudeau, along with numerous nefarious characters hawking get-rich-quick schemes on late-night infomercials.

The investigation will take months. “After all,” Warren said, “It’s not like there’s any shortage of self-serving, nonsense-spewing nitwits out there.”

Johnson added, “APRIL FOOLS!”

Well, at least about the part about the investigation.

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