10 Ways to Tell When Someone Is Lying to You

Let’s face it: Most of us lie every day. A famous study by a psychologist at the University of Massachusetts found that “60% of people lied at least once during a 10-minute conversation and told an average of two to three lies.”

Most of us are not very good at spotting a lie. And science so far hasn’t done much better. Polygraph machines (popularly referred to as lie detectors) aren’t reliable enough to be used in most courts. And while brain researchers keep trying to unravel the mechanism of lying, they have come up with nothing definitive.

Even so, knowing a few things about lies and their tellers might someday help you. Here are some of the more popular techniques researchers and others working in law enforcement recommend when trying to spot a lie:

1. Voice changes

Aaron Amat / Shutterstock.com
Aaron Amat / Shutterstock.com

Changes in a person’s normal behavior can betray discomfort of some sort, and might be a tip-off to lies. These departures from normal behavior are most useful when you are observing someone you know well and are familiar with their normal patterns, and departures from those patterns.

If you don’t know your subject well, spend time paying attention to how she or he normally talks and acts when relaxed. Is her speech normally slow or quick, loud or soft? What is the quality of his voice usually like? Then, watch for distinct, but not subtle, changes from the normal pattern, retired FBI criminal profiler Gregg McCrary tells Real Simple.

2. Fidgeting

suriyachan / Shutterstock.com
suriyachan / Shutterstock.com

Guilt and the accompanying anxiety are thought to cause some people — although perhaps not accomplished liars — to squirm and fidget. But experts disagree on whether fidgeting really is a telltale sign of lying. Again, it might be more important to know whether fidgeting is typical for a person, or if it is an unusual behavior.

Some people do the opposite of fidgeting — they cope with stress by standing still or freezing.

3. Protesting too much

Dundanim / Shutterstock.com
Dundanim / Shutterstock.com

“The lady doth protest too much, methinks,” says Queen Gertrude, Hamlet’s mother, while watching a play in which a character swears she’ll never remarry if her husband dies. The queen is pointing out that liars sometimes give themselves away by making too big a point of proclaiming their innocence.

A twist on this is when someone loudly denies guilt or takes offense at the idea they might be thought guilty even though no one has actually accused them of anything. This hostile defensiveness can include finger-pointing.

4. Vowing honesty

Rob Hyrons / Shutterstock.com
Rob Hyrons / Shutterstock.com

Liars often work too hard to demonstrate their honesty, and that can be a dead giveaway. They’ll make too much use of vows and expressions like “to tell the truth,” “to be perfectly honest,” “I swear on a stack of Bibles” and “as God is my witness.”

5. Subtle eye movements

dotshock / Shutterstock.com
dotshock / Shutterstock.com

Lying is thought to be stressful for most liars. They have to think about what’s true and concoct a story that departs from the truth, causing a level of strain that, even when it’s subtle, may be observable.

This stress can show up in a number of unconscious gestures. Liars are said to look away, or perhaps glance at an exit, betraying a desire to escape, says Psychology Today. Liars sometimes point their feet or even move their bodies in the direction of the exit.

6. Throat clearing

Mr.Exen / Shutterstock.com
Mr.Exen / Shutterstock.com

When you are talking with someone who clears his or her throat repeatedly or continues swallowing hard, see if you can figure out the reason for it. The person might just have something stuck in their throat, but be aware that stress can make your mouth dry, forcing a liar to try to relieve the condition.

7. TMI

Roberts Photography / Shutterstock.com
Roberts Photography / Shutterstock.com

Liars, at least unskilled ones — and we can all hope that the liars in our lives at least aren’t very good at it — may try to create a distraction by offering much too much information. If you find yourself wondering why you’re getting all this unnecessary detail, sit back, watch and listen. Then, ask yourself what’s going on.

8. Touching the mouth

woyzzeck / Shutterstock.com
woyzzeck / Shutterstock.com

People who hold their hands around their mouth, covering it or touching it, are unconsciously betraying the fact that they’re lying, behavioral analyst Lillian Glass tells Business Insider:

“When adults put their hands over their lips, it means they aren’t revealing everything, and they just don’t want to tell the truth,” she says. “They are literally closing off communication.”

9. Signs of nervousness

g-stockstudio / Shutterstock.com
g-stockstudio / Shutterstock.com

Nervousness betrays many liars. Signs of nervousness aren’t hard to spot. For example, someone who is nervous may experience changes in their breathing tempo. Under stress, a person’s shoulders rise and fall, and his or her voice rises.

10. Fixed staring

Diana Elfmarkova / Shutterstock.com
Diana Elfmarkova / Shutterstock.com

Blinking, looking away and the inability to look you in the eye are supposed to be signs of evasion with some people. Others, though, may look you right in the eye and lie — but they can give themselves away by staring too intently or failing to blink, Glass says.

This brazen behavior might be the sign of a more-accomplished liar. Financial scammer Bernard Madoff, “like most con men, overcompensated and stared at people longer than usual, often without blinking at regular intervals,” Glass tells Business Insider.

What do you do when you lie, or what do you see when people lie to you? Share with us in comments below or on our Facebook page.

Disclosure: The information you read here is always objective. However, we sometimes receive compensation when you click links within our stories.

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